I dunno lahs... was playing O2 jam. Maybe it is something better than blogging ? Training my brain and fingers ? But isn't blogging the same thing ??
My feelings.. they are turning numb. BecoZ i have chosen to give it up. It is a transition period. Becoz of my dad and her, i have chosen to let go of love. DAd is walking about, making this entry abit hard to type...
Something... that i choose to keep in the most inner chambers of my heart.. did not end up very well when i released it. All i can say now is, it's like building a building with her, yet she took de very first floor of the building. i have to save all the people, in the building and bear it's crushing impact on my empire. Save all de people.. which is to erase.. all de memories of them with her. dun understand ? nvm.. i tink i'm crapping too. Dunno what i typing. Xin li de suan wei hao nan shou.
I choose to keep it in then. But i know what happens when i do. De ice will start forming. Coldness will grip me once more.. it'll take some time.. time will heal all wounds.. comforting myself, despite telling myself to let go and decided to.
i've decide to come in to blog, becoZ i can't stand it any more !! "Try to tink inverted" Mr "mul" came in with all the rubbish. Washing machine. Talked for the whole bloody 15 mins. IF U HAVE SAVED UR JIAO WEI FER THAT TIME, WE WOULD HAVE LEARNED SOMETHING NEW. So what if u have sat in that old school for 18 years ? SO WHAT IF U HAVE OR HAVE NOT ? Does IT Satisfy u to see ppl dying right infront of ur face? I so want to tell him in his face : A man in de ocean, face the strong currents. He is to survive them and get ashore (which is to get ahead in life) Yet he is in treacheous waves and icy cold waters. Conditions are tough. Yet YOU, driving ur boat, moving past the so many of us in the ocean. Some of us cling on, trying to rest for later. Some of us swim and perserve on. Yet, do you know ur boat will cause extra waves to de many waves already exsisting ? Ever thot before ?? YOU look like a life guard, but actually u'r not. YOU look like a saviour, but u'r not. YOU have the life buoy in YOUR hands. Yet what u throw, is something with out a string. It's juZ support for a little longer. Yet what u throw, is something with so little strength that the person can't even reach. it's call, watching them die. YOUR ship cannot reach the lands for us. We all know what.. but why don't u try something more simplicity and more less tedious..
All right, tat's my opinions, my thinking. If you so wanted to say "everyone has their teaching style" then so be it. Your Teaching.. Try checking in at the air port gate at 12.31 when ur flight is at 12.30. Heard of "last call" ? Or it nv did imply in your life ? how society works ? We no nid to tell us that. We'r already experiencing it.. I juZ hate it when u think too theortically. When one miss a flight, is that what u deemed as "happy " for you ? can't u tink of how sad it is to miss it and u'r there saying this kind of feng liang hua. Buay tahan.. U made us tink, yet do u know how periods and stuff we have to go through each day ? Do u really tink that, by doing so, it's really helping ?
What is helping and not helping ? Is jUZ that i can't really understand what de dam collegue teachers is tinking. Why can't they b more concerned, instead of giving us de "we r retarded students". I'm convinced at last, some of the teachers actually nv believed in us all. ALL ALONG. They'r juz treating us like dirts. I dun mean to say this, but if u tink that teaching is a whore THEN GET OUT. You wan theory ? I GIVE YOU. A teacher must understand, teach patientially and show care and concerned for their pupils. Is that what everyone is doing?
Define.. Define.. define.. ceteris paribus.. blah blah blah.. can life be defined ?? Or Is it too square for you to not accept it ? Enough of him, waste time only. The REST ALSO. I tink i dun wan to type any more. My right arm is still aching like hell, left arm slightly.
My only dream now, is to find "De GaL" n my bar. M i on another fairy tale ? Or m i not ? I won't know.. you tell me. Let the dices roll, let the sands flow in the hourglasses.. n let the stars glow in the sky. Under the purple moon upon the cloudy orange sky.. What is nightmare when u'r in hell..
